Waiting!!

Oh the waiting! I suppose it is similar to being a week from your due date and just needing that baby to come out:/ Despite the pain and discomfort, I do wish that I had been able to experience pregnancy. I have not given up hope for the future but right now, all of our love and focus is reserved for this itty bitty girl we're waiting so patiently for.

I have been pumping for 2 ½ days. I sit in the nursery every three hours with baby clothes on my lap and happy baby thoughts in my mind and pump for 10 minutes. I still have only droplets but they are increasing. Everyone I have spoken to: parents, LLL leaders and lactation consultants all say the same thing - putting the baby to my breast will be the best way of increasing my supply. A baby is better than any pump on the market. One dilemma was that the supplemental nursing system that I will likely require is $150 and not returnable if this plan ultimately doesn't work:/ I have been going back and forth but need to do it now if I'm going to be ready for the baby. That is a hefty cost for someone who is not working. Fortunately, and quite coincidentally, my mom realized that the cello player in her orchestra is the lactation consultant at Lawrence and Memorial. I called her on a whim today while staring at the virtual shopping cart with the $150 sns in it, and she told me that she has a couple of them at home that she'll give me for free:) They are not as convenient as the one I planned to order but at least I can see if it works for the baby before dishing out the money for the other one! She also offered her office and services at L&M whenever I need them. I was concerned that as the adoptive mom, I would get none of the benefits that birthmom's get in the hospital. No one is going to come to me and say, "Hey, let me show you how to breastfeed your adopted baby and use the sns at the same time." As a "visitor" at the hospital, I don't think I'll get that kind of treatment. Though you never know I guess. I have had some regular contact with the lac consultant at Middlesex...maybe she will help me on the down low. She told me that there is a breastfeeding class being held at Middlesex this Wednesday. I imagine I'll be the only non-pregnant mom looking to breastfeed her adopted child. Well, I've never shied away from the spotlight before...no need to start now.

I'm going to go back to waiting now. Think healthy baby thoughts!